If you get 10 000 guys to put their ideal woman into a computer it still comes out looking like Angelina Jolie.
I've got a great relationship with my dad but I can imagine how annoying it would be if I had to move back into his house.
When I write I create really absurd situations which become false because I am after the joke.
Bad impulse buys make you feel grim don't they? It's like having consumer Tourette's. I gravitate towards austere foreign-language film DVDs when insecure.
Middle-aged women on telly is a bit of a hot topic - before we were 27 to 37 and now we're 40 to 50. You do notice as you get older... you go past 35 and suddenly you're playing baddies.
The only way I'll ever run a marathon is if I'm involved in the administration.
I'm sorry to say I'm very lizard-like. My skin is dry so covering my face in greasy antioxidants is a better alternative.
I don't get star-struck at all.
I have a lot of funny friends though not everyone's funny all the time. Doon Mackichan's my funniest friend in the pub; Nina Conti's the funniest with a monkey.
I'm very devoted to my kids - I'm completely blind to their faults.
When I'm a brunette it's four times harder to hail a taxi. Then I go blonde again and suddenly there are taxis everywhere.
I'm a big fan of community and I think independence is over-rated.
I wasn't hugely popular at school. In fact I was bullied at school.
I'm feeling incredibly Botox-tempted as my face collapses around my shoulders.
TV feels quite constipated and the thing I find particularly difficult is the branding of the channels where it's not 'Is it a good script?' but 'Is it a BBC2 script?'
I dont have the self-discipline for diets; I break rules I set for myself so I try and eat more healthily juice more and avoid sugar.
I have three boys so I live in a household full of testosterone.
A lot of things in 'Parents' I find very truthful.
When I'm depressed I definitely comfort eat but I also eat when I'm happy. The only time I don't eat is if I am terribly nervous.
It's quite confusing being one of the less wealthy people at a posh place.
A Local Government Stationery Store is something to behold. It's like walking through the back of a cupboard into a really dull Narnia.
My first film crush was Mark Lester as Oliver Twist in the Carol Reed film.
I always carry a pair of scissors around with me to cut things out of magazines.
Comedians have to write to survive because you don't get cast for your beauty.
The children break all my jewelry so everything I wear is cheap - from Topshop or Dorothy Perkins.
I've got spider veins all over my legs so I wear opaque tights all winter. All sorts of colours.
I definitely used to write a lot at school. Comic poetry and drawings about people.
Once you have a Down's syndrome child you can't conform. In a way you're free.
Its quite confusing being one of the less wealthy people at a posh place.
I think everyone is forgetting what plastic surgery is for - if you have a face-eating tumour lose a breast or are involved in a car accident then it's a good idea.
Red carpets and dressing up are a part of work that I enjoy less than some people.
I would love to have been around in the Keystone Studios days.
I start the day with the intention of doing 4 000 sit-ups but then have to work.
Getting a new passport took me a stupid amount of time. I had to go back five times with different photographs because they kept saying I was smiling which is against the rules. I was not smiling.
I truly would love to be a designer-label girl but I am very much High Street.
I never ever Google myself. That way madness lies.
I can make a virtue of slapdash. Slapdash can give you courage.
All I want to do really is get married and be a matriarch.
My mum's from Yorkshire and my parents aren't snotty or posh - they're very hard workers both of them.
I tell people that I'm a Christian but I don't think it's giving an insight into who I am or what I'm about.
People have really strong images of what church is and it's almost certainly not the same as mine.
I don't leave London really and I don't do theatre because I want to put the kids to bed.