Paul Mooney Quotes

White people are very good at acting like they're not racist. They deserve an Academy Award for that.

Whatever that thing is that white people like in blacks I don't have it. Maybe it's my arrogance or my self-assurance or the way I carry myself but whatever it is I don't have it.

We have a lot of black Anglo-Saxons. Their skin is black but their brain is white. When I get real mad at them I call them graham crackers.

Arizona has always been anti-black.

I can't change the past but one person can change the future - anything can happen.

I think I have a mental nappy attitude.

People ask me when was my best time? I always say 'Today.'

I don't want affirmative action - too much affirmative not enough action.

Tennessee Williams knew about the South but he would clean it up and lie about it.

I could drop dead tomorrow the truth will be here. Truth is forever; when you read our history truth is forever and it always outs itself.

An audience can be like a pack of wolves.

What does America love more than one white male?

I'm as American as apple pie.

I think about never losing my voice never giving in never selling out always keeping black always sticking to the street. Staying neighborhood and not Hollywood.

I love Obama because he is proof all black people don't look alike. Nobody every told me 'Good morning Mr. President.' We don't all look alike.

What does it mean to be too black for Hollywood? It's self-explanatory. Hollywood has certain kinds of blacks that they like.

If you have money and you have fame but you don't have any confidence in your blackness then it's all for nothing.

I've never seen anyone more messed up over success than Richard Pryor. For him it's a constant battle between success in the white world and keeping it real for his black self.

There are still plenty of movie people peddling black stereotypes. I guess Tyler Perry's probably the most massively successful.

Listen we've got one little ol' black president and white folks are upset but they've had 43.

My comedy is a nuclear bomb inside my mind. It's a weapon that's never been tested. It just blows up and flattens everybody.

My grandmother was the best. She loved you for you. She loved me for me. She was old-school. They broke the mold with her. They don't make them like that any more.

A new broom can sweep the floor but an old broom knows where the dirt is.

I'm passionate about what I do. I'd be naive to be passive.

If you're happy with what you're doing then you don't get bored.

When I was 16 or 17 I saw Lenny Bruce being taken to jail. They took him off stage because he talked about race.

Robin Williams learned technique. He has the technique of being funny.

America has a rap sheet. You can't police the world and tell the world how to act when you're just as bad yourself.

A woman can tell me about her having a baby but I'll never know what it is to have a baby.

I do celebrate anything with freedom in it you know.

Majority doesn't rule. One person can change the history of the world.

You can't pick when you're touched. You can't pick the time. It just is. It's the reality. What it is is. I can't change the past. I can only deal with the present and the future.

America is racial. America was founded on race. Race is America. The code name for America is 'race.'

I don't do drugs. Because my grandmother raised me. I think like an old black Southern woman. If I'd have done coke I'd probably be cooking pancakes.

I have such an ego 'cause I'm a double Leo. I can't let go of me you know so it's very difficult for me to be somebody else and not me. I'm so into me.

Comedians period in general have demons and myself included.

There's always a message in my comedy.

You got to remember that slavery's very complex. It has a lot of levels to it.

The king of comedy is dead. Richard Pryor was the king of comedy. The rest of them are the king of copycats.

People think you're crazy if you turn money down... people worship money.

You white folks see UFOs in your dreams. You don't hear about Martians in Harlem.

When you know who you are you know who you are. That's the real dangerous thing in Hollywood because they all want to create you and mold you.

I like when people are trapped in the joke when there's no escape. I like to lead people down the wrong path and then trap them.

I got my sense of humor from my grandmother. You know my grandmother was very funny.

I read a lot of history. The passive Jews in Germany didn't survive. The smart ones got out.

A goat's a goat. Whether you sauté or barbeque it it's still a goat.

People in America worship money and a white man's face on a green piece of paper does not make me wealthy. My health makes me wealthy. I used to work at a hospital so I know the real deal.

Hollywood doesn't even have respect for itself. Hollywood lies to itself.

If your hair is relaxed white people are relaxed. If your hair is nappy they're not happy.

Racism is a form of insanity. Human beings became racist when they started talking. Speech has a lot to do with it.

I have nothing to do with racism in America; it was here when I got here.

People don't want to hear the truth they never do. They wanna live in some kind of fantasy. And then when they get caught up in it they start being in denial because they don't want to be wrong.

America does not like losers. Look how we treated those soldiers who came back from Vietnam. Because they lost. America likes winners.

I have known Michael Richards for something like 20 years. We're friends.

Handshaking means 'I don't have a weapon.'

There's no such thing as reverse racism.

Sometimes what you do you have no control over because it's predestined. It's gonna happen in spite of you. There's nothing you can do about it.

People do many things for many reasons. Sometimes what you do you have no control over because it's predestined. It's gonna happen in spite of you. There's nothing you can do about it.