Jeff Kinney Quotes

But the thing I'm finding out is some people don't really appreciate it when you'r trying to be helpful.

Mom is always saying I'm a smart kid but that I just don't apply myself.

My advice to authors would be to try to do something original rather than to try to anticipate what the market is looking for.

hey guys i would like you to try this book you will love it!

Greg starts a middle school and asks: Why is "bullies" such a big PROBLEM? And says people need to shave twice a day.

The key to any good comic strip or television sitcom is to reset the board at the end of the episode because people like familiarity.

To come out and meet kids who have my books in their hands is kind of amazing.

Kids can sniff out when they are being preached to and they don't like it. So while my books aren't amoral they are not infused with morals or a message either and kids like that.

When you're used to having electricity and then all of a sudden it's taken away you're basically just one step from being a wild animal.

hope your birthday is hot hot hot

I think the most satisfying part about filmmaking is seeing a production in full bloom. When I write I write in isolation.

You and your group of nerds fall into a pit and it's full of dynamite and you blow up. The End.

I think if everyone would write down the funny stories from their own childhoods the world would be a better place.

I think humor is key [to a successful middle-grade novel]. Kids like to read for entertainment and the best way to entertain kids is to make them laugh.

I don't know if this makes me a bad person or whatever but it's hard for me to get interested in other people's vacations.

I'll be famous one day but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffley

Working with Dav Pilkey was a dream come true. Dav is incredibly funny and he's been a hero of mine for a long time. It was great bringing the 'Wimpy Kid' and 'Captain Underpants' worlds together!

... no matter how nice you are to some people they'll turn their back on you the second they get the chance.

The best person I know is Myself.

I`m basically one of the best people I know.

I'm having a seriously hard time getting used to the fact that summer is over and I have to get out of bed every morning to go to school.

I really wanted to be a newspaper cartoonist but nobody liked my work. I didn't have the control or flair that was necessary to create something that didn't look childish.

I don't think of cartoons or comics as being for kids.

I'm not very charismatic or telegenic. I feel bad for the kids waiting three hours in line for their book to be signed.

I'm probably something like 95% chicken nugget

I labored for eight years thinking I was writing a book for adults that was a nostalgic look back on childhood. Then my publisher informed me I'd written a children's book.

I labored for eight years thinking that I was writing a book for adults that was a nostalgic look back on childhood. Then my publisher informed me I'd written a children's book.

Because it's our choices that makes us who we are...

Youre gonna grow up and marry some ice cream! Haha!

He got the crib so for the first few months of my life I had to sleep in the top dresser drawer which I'm pretty sure isn't even legal.

I didn't really know what to expect from detention but when I waked into the room the first thought I had was I don't belong in here with these future criminals.

hot pink looks cute on only janet which is MEEEEEEE!!!

If there's one thing I learned from Rodrick it's to set people's expectations real low so you end up surprising them by practically doing nothing at all.

that if you don't read nobody does

Back in those days it was just me swimming around in the dark doing back flips and taking naps whenever I want.

fish and visitors stink in 3 days.

You can't expect everyone to have the same dedication as you.

See when you're a little kid nobody ever warns you that you've got an expiration date. One day you're hot stuff and the next day you're a dirt sandwich.

I think Diary of a Wimpy kidis sooooo good!!!!!!!

Well the problem is it's not easy for me to think of ways to improve myself because I'm pretty much one of the best people I know.

So if you want to find somebody to blame for the way i am I guess you'd have to start with the public education system.

Holly is the fourth-prettiest girl in the class but the top 3 all have boyfriends. So a lot of guys like me are doing everything they can to get in good with her.

I'm not really sure what makes a book a 'classic' to begin with but I think it has to be at least fifty years old and some person or animal has to die at the end.

I think goodreads is the best place to look for books

hay he's a great writer and i like him a lot

I realised all the good ideas were taken before I was even born.

I only work on my books at nights and at weekends. It is really just like a hobby.

I read the 'Harry Potter' books as I was writing my own books and I love them but I don't think Harry was very much like I was as a kid. He's always brave and he's perfect in a lot of ways.

Kids can sniff out a moral. They can feel the heavy hand of an adult.

I don't know what a guy needs to do to impress a girl these days.

Chirag: Rowley do you think I exist? Rowley: Nope! I can't even hear you or see you!

Monkeys can't talk stupid!

I've never run into a person who yearns for their middle school days.

It's not easy to writing thank-you notes for the stuff you didn't want in the first place.

So I've started wearing sweatpants to bed because I really don't need Santa seeing me in my underwear.

The only reason I get out of bed at all on weekends is because eventually I can't stand the taste of my own breath any more.